Rebecca’s 2019 Purposeful Gaming Challenge, In Review

I’ve had a bit of a love/hate relationship with 52 Week challenges since I was in college. More than a few friends at the time were always trying to tackle something, whether it was 52 books or 52 movies. I always liked the idea of the challenge; there’s a part of me that craves structure and checklists and finality. I liked the thought of being able to say that I’d stuck with something meaningful and formed a habit of it—increased my media literacy and all that. On the other hand, there was always that voice in the back of my head saying why create so many rules to make something you enjoy more difficult? 

Looking back on the last year, I am not yet certain I’ve successfully managed and married those two sides of myself, but I think I got pretty close. The concept of the Purposeful Gaming Challenge is nothing unique or particularly earth-shattering in the face of every other 52 Week Challenge on this planet. But I started it in the hopes of not only holding myself accountable to maintaining my game literacy, but also creating a more meaningful headspace for saying no. I’m not good at no—in fact, I’m honestly pretty awful at no. I struggle to say no to myself sometimes, even when I can feel myself shriveling up as I pile more and more on my plate. Maybe it’s the universe keeping the balance of things, but 2019 ended up mowing me down like a truck, and because of it, learning how to say no became a difficult—almost crippling—necessity. 

Yes, voice in the back of my head, maybe the PGC is putting too many rules on something I enjoy, but what’s wrong with trying? I found a lot of value in approaching the PGC as a lesson in no by learning how to respect my time. As kids, we often have a lot of time but little cash to buy games. When we grow up, we have the money but hardly the time to put into anything at all. There’s a lot of games out there, a lot of great ones even, but not all of them respect your time. Not all of them even deserve it. For me, the PGC helped me to feel more confident in saying no to what I didn’t like for the ultimate benefit of having more bandwidth for what I did like.

There’s room for improvement here, of course, but at the end of all this, I do feel a great sense of pride in myself for sticking to the commitment I made. Even when I felt my worst, I still showed up and played something. I never missed a single week. Saying no got just a little easier, and that’s an energy I’m happy to channel in all aspects of my life as I move into 2020. 

So what is the room for improvement, anyway?

I’m not perfect and slipped into anxiety even with the best of intentions in mind. Toward the end of the year I started to feel pressured to stay on top of the sheer volume of releases from 2019 that I’d not played, and as a result, I feel as though I set myself up to fail just a bit. There were weeks when I committed to playing three or four games when I certainly didn’t have the bandwidth for more than maybe one or two at most. The upside to this is that I found myself being much more willing to say no to things that didn’t connect with me right away, but I wonder if that came at the expense of not giving some games their fair shot. It’s a marathon, not a sprint, after all. Until they’re paying me to play these games, there is no meaningful reason to feel like I have to play every single one. 

In sum, I played 61 games for the PGC, along with 7 other games I didn’t count for the challenge (why didn’t I count them? They totally count!). Of those 61, I was able to finish 21 of them, felt confident saying that I liked and wanted to finish 15 more, and made a commitment to saying no to 12.

The Hard Data

If you’re anything like me and enjoy a good breakdown of the metrics (or just like looking at pictures of pie charts), I’ve got you covered with some of the facts.

  1. Nintendo Switch (18 games / 30%): I traveled pretty frequently this year, both.domestically and internationally, so having the Switch to tote around with me made it easy to keep up on the PGC when I was away from my more sedentary consoles. More and more, I find myself craving Switch releases for things, especially indies, as I enjoy the portability and flexibility the Switch provides.   
  2. PlayStation 4 (13 games / 21%): The PS4 is my primary console and remains the platform I buy all my AAA, big-ticket games for. Because of my move toward buying indie releases on the Switch, I have found that I generally purchase fewer games for the PlayStation 4 overall. 
  3. iOS (11 games / 18%): I was surprised how highly my phone ranked as a platform for me this year. The release of the Apple Arcade subscription service, along with mobile versions of many excellent indie games, gave my Switch a run for its money as my primary small-game device. As of this writing, I’m still subscribed to the Apple Arcade and plan to see it into the new year. 
  4. PC (9 games / 15%): PC has always been a middle-of-the-road platform for me. My job requires me to spend hours a day at a desk in front of a computer, so I find I’m less interested in going home and doing the same thing all night long. For this reason, I generally try to buy games on consoles where I can, but occasionally will still fire up the old PC, especially for exclusives and fun finds on 
  5. Xbox One (7 games / 11%): I picked up an Xbox One S over the summer, so it perhaps didn’t get a fair shot at being higher on the list. Ever since I purchased the console, it’s remained a Game Pass machine, which allowed me to play a lot of games I never planned to. As of this writing, I’m still subscribed to Xbox Game Pass, and absolutely plan to maintain a membership for the foreseeable future. 
  6. Et Cetera (3 games / 5%): I also ended up playing three additional games, two on the 3DS and one on the Xbox 360, to round out my 61. 

Because the PGC is largely about learning how to better respect your own time and embrace the games that you most enjoy playing, I decided to sort each game into one of five categories:

  1. Finished (21 games / 34%): These are the games I played through from beginning to end. For me, level of finished-ness doesn’t matter, so this metric accounts for those few games I saw through 100% as well as those whose story I finished and put down. Some highlights: Outer Wilds, Control, Later Alligator. 
  2. Unfinished – Will Complete (15 games / 25%): These are the games that were maybe too long and all-encompassing for me to see to the end, but the ones that piqued my interest and kept me wanting more (and more…and more…). Some highlights: Mutazione, The Outer Worlds, Disco Elysium. 
  3. Unfinished – Won’t Complete (12 games / 20%): This category was a hard lesson for me as I generally believe (erroneously) that I will eventually finish all the games that I play. In an attempt to force myself to be at peace with my bandwidth, I used this category to be extremely judicious about how I wanted to spend my time. Not all games have to make the cut, and that’s okay. Some highlights: Moonlighter, Void Bastards, Ashen. 
  4. Ongoing (7 games / 11%): This category is all about games that maybe don’t necessarily have a distinct finish point or are games that I can see myself returning to periodically when I have a few moments to give. Some highlights: Wilmot’s Warehouse, Baba is You, My Time at Portia. 
  5. One-off (6 games / 10%): I used this category to give myself some wiggle room to return to older games, local multiplayer games, or games I’ve previously finished when the itch struck me. I didn’t want to be too restrictive on only pulling from my backlog, so this category is just the right amount of flexibility that I needed. Some highlights: The Stretchers, Bloodborne, Murdered: Soul Suspect. 

Finally, we come to the release dates. Almost 60% of the games I played this year, released this year—35 in all, with many more still left unplayed. I also was able to clean up some releases from 2018, playing 15 games in total. The remaining chunk of games came from the last 20 years, going back in time as far as 1998.

The Harder Data

So, you like spreadsheets, do you? Here is the full breakdown of every game I played in 2019.


Itch n’ Bitch #1: An Roundup

Every week we do a roundup of the best games that you can play on Here are three games that I think are worth your time.

Au Fil De L’eau

If you’ve ever wanted to take a weekend trip to relax in a video game, look no further than Au Fil De L’eau (At the Water’s Edge). Au Fil De L’eau is described as “a short meditation game about kayaking” by its creator Samson Auroux. Similar to a visual novel, Au Fil De L’eau uses unique frames and panels for the player to move in and out of, which is reminiscent of a Wes Anderson film. This unusual narrative design let me explore beautifully painted landscapes while drinking in the surroundings as I drifted down a quiet river in my kayak. The soft bossa nova-like beats further set the tone, and a sense of leisure washed over me. 

What I like about this game the most is how it conveys a narrative through simplistic pictures and ideas without the use of words. There is no gamification, object, or goal to meet— simply explore and float your way down a river. And of course, the game is gorgeous; it’s like swimming through a watercolor world. Where I’d like to see this game improve is the control over movement. Nothing snaps you out of the moment quicker than getting caught on a rock or hitting a wall while traversing in your kayak or car. You should play this game for its beautiful scenery and the soothing daze it lulls you into, but also for its unique use of narrative framing. 

Release date: July 11, 2019
Time to finish: Under an hour
Game Dev: Samson Auroux


Short, minimal, and ominous are a few words to describe this next game. In Disposable, you play as a small robot whose goal is to unlock a door in this big room by “hacking” several terminals. The creator of this game is Martin Cohen, and while they list this one level, 2D side scroller as a prototype, what’s there is pure gold. Right away, the pixel art struck me as cold and industrial, dark and eerie. I was waiting for some mechanical monster to creep out of the shadows and chomp at me, almost like a 2D Ridley Scott’s Alien. I felt a deep sense of isolation from all the empty space, which is only amplified by the small size of the robot character. Honestly, it was almost like playing a lost level of Hyper Light Drifter, especially considering the dashing mechanics used to traverse within the level. Disposable nails the atmospheric design and for as small a prototype as it is, it’s incredibly successful. I’d like to see more levels, or at least what’s on the other side of that door. It’s worth every minute of your time to check out.

Release date: July 27, 2015
Time to finish: Under 20 minutes
Game Dev: Martin Cohen

The Goodtime Garden

Buckle up because The Goodtime Garden is weird, y’all. Created by James Carbutt and Will Todd, The Goodtime Garden is a hand-drawn surreal experience where a naked manbaby gathers strangely sexual objects to feed its “friend.” I honestly would expect a game like this to be sponsored by Adult Swim, who is known for supporting unusual projects. The Goodtime Garden’s art style has a sense of soft and squishy, with no hard or sharp edges to be found anywhere. This softness is a good thing because everything in this world references genitalia, or is literally genitalia, and I love it. Phallic Mushrooms? It has them. Trees with scrotum leaves? Check. Breast rocks? Duh. Usually, nudity within games is often shocking or offensive, but in The Goodtime Garden, I found the nudity less lewd or vulgar and more fun and palatable— though disturbing at times. 

What took me by surprise were the characters. The first talking animal you come across is a small frog that wants water. When you finally water them (I won’t spoil how), the frog starts saying. “Mmm dripping!…. Moist! Mmmmm!… Ahhhhh...” in a quenched relief. This sexually charged moment is honestly tame compared to other characters who shout, “Ooo, I love that baby dick!” which is incredibly jarring but so absurd it’s hilarious. What I like most about this game is how similar it feels to Hohokum (2014) with Richard Hogg’s simplistic and weird art style. I’m not sure if James and Will were trying to recreate that experience, but they’ve done it either way. If you want an uncomfortably hilarious time with strange and disturbing creatures, The Goodtime Garden has you covered. 

Release date: October 19, 2019
Time to finish: Under an hour
Game Dev: James Carbutt and Will Todd

Games News Roundup 11/28/19 – 12/3/19

This week in one sentence: Riot Games settled a gender discrimination lawsuit, In the Valley of Gods is no longer in active development, Super Mario Maker 2 added The Legend of Zelda content, pictures of the PlayStation 5 development kit were leaked, and the FBI is using PSN to gather evidence of a cocaine dealer.

Top Five Stories

1/ Riot Games Settles Gender Discrimination Lawsuit With A $10 Million Pay Out: Riot Games, the developer of League of Legends, is settling a lawsuit that started in 2018. The lawsuit alleged that the company created a hostile work environment with rampant sexual harassment toward women. The $10 million settlement will distribute money to women who worked for Riot Games from November 2014 until the date the settlement is finalized. Payment will be based on the length of a woman’s tenure and her full-time employment status. Women who have left the company or who have signed severance agreements will not receive any part of the settlement. (Los Angeles Times / Kotaku / Forbes / Ars Technica / The Washington Post)

2/ In the Valley of Gods development is “On Hold”: Campo Santo co-founder Jake Rodkin confirmed that In the Valley of Gods is “On Hold” and that the former team has distributed among various projects at Valve, including Half-Life: Alyx and DotA Underlords. Valve acquired Campo Santo in April 2018 with the announcement blog post stating the company, “[Would] continue production on our current project, In the Valley of Gods.” The game is not outright canceled but there is no announced release window. (CNET / Polygon / / Gamespot / Rock Paper Shotgun)

3/ Super Mario Maker 2 Is Adding The Master Sword And Link: Nintendo announced that new features are coming in a free patch to Super Mario Maker 2. One of these key features is the Master Sword from The Legend of Zelda series, which acts as a power-up. The sword transforms the player into Link and confers the ability to shoot arrows, throw bombs, slash enemies, and block projectiles with a shield. The update also adds new building blocks, new enemies, and a speed-running mode. (Kotaku / Ars Technica / Vice / IGN / Destructoid)

4/ The Look Of The PlayStation 5 Dev Kit Was Leaked: An alleged image of the PlayStation 5 development (dev) kit was leaked into the wild. The kits are stackable v-shaped computers with large vents in the sides and center. The kits also seem to be using a controller that looks similar to the Dualshock 4. The development kit’s look is not indicative of the final console design. The twitter user who posted the image (@alcoholikaust) claimed that the photograph came from a developer who, “just didn’t give a fuck apparently.” (Eurogamer / Gizmodo / PCMag / GamesRadar+ / ScreenRant)

5/ FBI Files Warrant To Obtain PSN Data Related To Alleged Drug Dealing: A search warrant filed by the FBI in the Western District of Missouri requested all information related to a PlayStation Network (PSN) user. The FBI alleges that the PSN user orchestrated the sale of cocaine by using voice chat. The FBI is attempting to gather a wide range of information about the alleged drug dealer, including the games they played, their IP address, and chat messages. (Gamespot / Vice / Polygon / The Daily Dot / Kotaku UK)

✏️ Notables

  • The Steam Controller can no longer be ordered, with some previously confirmed orders being canceled because Valve oversold their remaining stock. (Kotaku / The Verge)
  • U.S. Congressman pleads guilty to using campaign funds for Steam games. Duncan D. Hunter (R-CA) spent more than $1,000 on steam games. (Polygon / Gamespot)
  • The Resident Evil 3 Remake Cover Was Leaked confirming that the game is coming soon. (Gamespot / GamesRadar+)
  • The trailer for the next season of Destiny 2 content was revealed, along with the return of Saint-14 (Engadget / Kotaku)
  • Microsoft published Halo: Reach and the rest of the Halo: The Master Chief Collection on Steam. (Kotaku / PC Gamer)
  • The original PlayStation turned 25, which led to some nostalgic reflections. (The Verge, Kotaku)
  • Quantic Dreams was forced to pay a former employee because emlpoyees and leadership shared “homophobic, misogynistic, racist or deeply vulgar,” images in the workplace. (PC Gamer, Try aGame
  • YouTube relaxed its policy related to violent video game footage and will now allow creators to show footage without automatically flagging videos as age-restricted. (The Verge, Gamasutra)
  • Cloud Imperium Games raised more than $250 million via backers to develop Star Citizen. (PC Gamer, Eurogamer)
  • Mario Kart Tour was the most-downloaded iPhone game of 2019, even though it only released in September. (The Verge, 9to5Mac)

Playing CCGs Showed Me Something Dark About Myself

Collectible card games (CCGs) often sell themselves as the fantasy of playing as the master tactician. As the player, you can outsmart your opponent and create unbelievable combos through meticulous planning and tactical smarts. I always wanted to think of myself as a tactical person who could divine the secrets of these games.

Unfortunately, my desire to understand CCGs has devolved into a dark passenger. On my journey to master the game, I found myself becoming more focused on crushing opponents rather than trying to outwit them. I’m not sure I like the person what card games make me.

Innocent Beginnings

I played Magic the Gathering (MTG) for a short time with friends in college. I always wanted to be halfway proficient at card games but never had the money to build my deck or the time to watch YouTube strategy videos.

That changed when I picked up Hearthstone two years ago. The Warcraft aesthetic and easy-to-learn mechanics spoke to me. It started innocently enough; I played the single-player adventures and learned the basics. I created a few zero dust decks and dutifully completed my daily quests. I even started watching videos and learning the metagame.

Then I started trying to play the ranked ladder. That is when my dark side took hold.

That Cursed Ladder

Playing ranked games as a CCG beginner is not a fun experience. On the Hearthstone ranked ladder, you can progress to a certain starter rank without the fear of sliding into previous levels. However, once you get past that point, any loss will subtract from your progress. The higher you get your rank, the better the reward you will receive at the end of the season. These rewards will then allow you to create cards that are even more effective.

In addition to this high-stress atmosphere, your opponents on the ladder are also playing the most effective decks in the game that have been theory-crafted by some of the most devoted players. These decks aren’t cheap, and the only way to get your desired cards is to buy packs or craft them with resources gained from destroying other cards. This lack of cards incentivizes new players to purchase random packs with real-world money

The Original Loot Box

Buying packs with real money in Hearthstone costs $2.99 without any discounts. The prices go down the more packs you purchase, with $69.99 buying you 60 packs. There are limited-time bundle, but they often cap out at $80 for 100 packs. To add insult to injury, a player may be forced to open 40 packs until the pity timer triggers to receive one of the more powerful legendary cards.

As a beginner, I didn’t have the resources to create high-powered cards and did not want to spend real money on the game. I also couldn’t quickly grind resources because my decks weren’t as effective as my opponent’s expensive cards.

Crushing Your Opponent Is More Fun Than Winning

I felt lost until I found my first aggro (aggressive) deck. Aggro Warrior was my companion during these dark times. Aggro decks use the strategy of overwhelming the opponent before they can create a strong defense. These decks have minimum tools for removing cards that your opponent plays and no backup plan if you get a bad hand. It is a reckless deck that can get quick results but can also fall apart quickly.

This aggro deck showed me the fun in crushing my opponent. I delighted in seeing them quit on turn three. I lost as many games as I won, but it didn’t matter. Watching my opponent squirm was more fun than getting a higher rank. I could even start to predict when my opponents would quit — it was intoxicating.

I didn’t troll anyone, but I wasn’t playing as a tactician anymore. I took glee in my opponent’s misery. It wasn’t enough to win, it was about leaving them with no options beyond a quick death.

What Do We Owe To Each Other?

Do players have a responsibility to not use decks with cheap and overwhelming mechanics? 

Is it wrong to delight in the utter destruction of other players? I don’t think I was being a jerk, but does this kind of aggressive play ruin the game for others?

Some CCG experts would argue that decks like Evolve Shaman are ruining Hearthstone. Evolve Shaman is a deck archetype that involves flooding the game board with numerous cheap minions. The deck straddles the line between aggro and combo. Once the player has a nearly full board, they can play the Shaman card Evolve, which transforms the cheap minions into more expensive ones. Normally, the random nature of the Evovle card is a huge drawback, but when it is used in conjunction with cards like Desert Hare it can overwhelm the opponent before they can mount a defense.

I won’t disagree with the experts who concluded that Evolve Shaman is a plague upon the game. I played Evolve Shaman for a while and had to put it away because I got bored. The fun of destroying my opponent was ruined when they would concede the match upon seeing that I was playing Shaman.

New Meta, New Me

Recently, I started playing Control Warrior. Control decks specialize in controlling the state of the board and removing your opponents cards before they can hurt you. These types of decks are often some of the most expensive in the game because they require you to have certain rare cards that have outlandish effects. For example, my Control Warrior deck uses eight legendary cards. To get the resources to make those eight cards (without opening additional packs), you would need to destroy 320 of the most basic cards.

Control Warrior is a more reliable deck that can hold off these aggressive decks with tools that clear the board and set the pace of the game. These games are slower; a game involving two control decks can take upwards of 20 minutes. That’s a far cry from the 2-3 minute games involved in playing an aggro deck. Additionally, the game is often not decided until the last few turns and even then certain cards, like Archivist Elysiana, can reset the entire deck.

Saying Goodbye To The Darkness

It’s fun to make decisions that actually impact play and not pray for the perfect hand at the start of the game. Games that I play with Control Warrior can go hundreds of different ways and actually fulfill that fantasy of playing a tactician. It’s thrilling to take control and lull the opponent into a false sense of security. 

I’m not here to say that playing cheap aggro decks makes anyone a bad person. Aggressively, overwhelming an opponent is just as valid as stringing them along with a control deck. Additionally, being able to grind resources quickly is a response to these games’ parasitic monetization strategy.

It’s up to the developers to balance their games and not let any strategy rule the metagame. Evolve Shaman should be going away with the release of the new set in just a few days. Although a few of the cards, like Frizz Kindleroost, look to create more aggressive decks. 

Moving forward, I’m steering clear of these aggro decks. A person can only get so much joy out of watching their opponent quit on turn five.

Featured image art by Luca Zontini, courtesy of Activision-Blizzard.

Greetings From 22: Google Stadia’s No Good Very Bad Week


In our first episode of the Greetings From News Recap, we cover the biggest news from 11/12/19 through 11/26/19. We talked about the Half-Life Alyx announcement, Google Stadia’s rough launch, and the announcements from Xbox’s conference, XO 19.


Half-Life: Alyx Announcement Sources

Google Stadia Has A Rough Launch Sources

Xbox XO19 Sources

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Games News Roundup: 11/21/19 – 11/27/19

This week in one sentence: Google Stadia is still getting complaints about graphics, DotA 2 added a grandma and another spirit edgelord, the Steam Controller died for our sins, Battleborn died because of server costs, and No Man’s Sky is getting even better. 

Top Five Stories

1/ Google Responds To Stadia Graphical Fidelity Complaints: Google responded to complaints that many Stadia games do not run at the advertised native 4K resolution with a statement that said, “We give developers the freedom of how to achieve the best image quality and frame rate on Stadia.” Google also stated that, “We expect that many developers can, and in most cases will, continue to improve their games on Stadia.” (9to5Google / Eurogamer / Ars Technica / Gamespot /

2/ The Outlanders Patch For DotA 2 Was Released: Valve released Dota 2 patch 7.23 which added two new heroes to the game, Void Spirit and Beatrix Snapfire. Void Spirit is an edgy elemental melee character, and Beatrix Snapfire is an elderly woman who makes cookies and rides dinosaurs. The patch also gives every player a courier, replaces side shops with outposts, and a whole host of other adjustments to the game. (Rock Paper Shotgun / Engadget / IGN / Polygon / PC Gamer)

3/ Valve Has Stopped Making The Steam Controller: Valve’s last non-VR hardware, the Steam Controller, is dead. The divisive controller released in 2015 along with Steam Machines and Steam Link, and went on to sell an admirable 500,000 units in just a year. The controller never reached mainstream success, with most players choosing to use an Xbox 360 or PS4 controller to play Steam games. Valve is blowing out their remaining controller stock with a $5 sale. (Kotaku / Eurogamer / The Verge / VentureBeat / Screen Rant)

4/ Battleborn Is Shutting Down In 2021: Just three years after its release, publisher 2K Games announced that it is shutting down the servers for Battleborn in January 2021. The Gearbox developed game was removed from digital shelves on November 15th, 2019, and the game’s premium currency will no longer be purchasable as of February 24, 2020. The game will no longer be playable once the servers are shut down. (Gamespot / Polygon / Kotaku / Eurogamer /

5/ No Man’s Sky Synthesis Patch Announced: No Man’s Sky is getting another huge update in the form of the Synthesis patch. This patch allows players to upgrade and salvage starships, edit terrain more easily, save custom outfits, and drive the Exocraft in the first person. The patch also optimizes the VR version of the game and adds other quality of life improvements. (Polygon / Kotaku / Gamespot / IGN / Destructoid)

✏️ Notables

  • Google offered refunds to Stadia Pro members who already bought the free games. The free games for subscribers this month were Tomb Raider (2013) and Farming Simulator 19. (Kotaku / Ars Technica)
  • The Pokémon Global Link Service Is Shutting Down for Pokémon Sun, Moon, Ultra Sun, and Ultra Moon in February 2020. (Polygon / Nintendo Life)
  • Valve Removes More Than 1,000 Games From Steam because the publishers were abusing Steamworks allegedly. (Kotaku / PC Gamer)
  • Fallout 76 players have taken to using nuclear bombs on pacificts because the radiation can kill players who want to avoid combat. (Kotaku / VICE)
  • Fortnite held a fishing competition wherein players competed to catch the most fish to get a spray, pickaxe skin, and Llama trophy. (Polygon / Eurogamer)
  • Stardew Valley patch 1.4 was released on PC. The patch added new character events  clothes, hairstyles, fish ponds, and more. (Eurogamer / Polygon)
  • Beat Games, the developers of Beat Saber, were purchased by Facebook and are now part of Oculus Studios as an independent studio (Eurogamer / PC Gamer)
  • A new Tony Hawk game is rumored to be coming out, based on a podcast interview with professional skater Lizzie Armanto (Eurogamer / IGN)
  • Borderlands 3 has added Good Juju, a reference to the Destiny gun Bad Juju (Eurogamer / Polygon)
  • State of Decay 2 is coming to Steam, with Xbox Live cross-play (Eurogamer / PC Gamer)

Coaching Corner – Bloodborne: Episode #11

It’s Olivia’s first time playing Bloodborne–can veterans and superfans Rebecca and Tyler help her survive her first hunt?

In this episode: Olivia, Rebecca, Tyler